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The Devil’s Dictionary

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The Devil’s Dictionary

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Great
adj.
  “I’m great,” the Lion said — “I reign
  The monarch of the wood and plain!”
  The Elephant replied: “I’m great —
  No quadruped can match my weight!”
  ”I’m great — no animal has half
  So long a neck!” said the Giraffe.
  “I’m great,” the Kangaroo said — “see
  My femoral muscularity!”
  The ’Possum said: “I’m great — behold,
  My tail is lithe and bald and cold!”
  An Oyster fried was understood
  To say: “I’m great because I’m good!”
  Each reckons greatness to consist
  In that in which he heads the list,
  And Vierick thinks he tops his class
  Because he is the greatest ass.
Arion Spurl Doke