The Devil’s Dictionary X™1,267 terms |
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E5
- evolution
- a theory with absolutely no proof, excepting billions of fossils, bacteria, finches, tortoises, pigeons, insects—all living creatures in fact—single point mutations, cellular automata, peas, the laws of physics, and common sense; aside from that, evolution doesn’t have a leg to stand on.
compare with intelligent design. - ex-boyfriend
- 1. a stalker; one who stalks.
- 2. a man incapable of telling small lies with a straight face.
- ex-girlfriend
- 1. a woman who expects everything about her relationship to a man will stay exactly the same following a sudden and inexplicable discontinuation of all sexual activity with him; a victim.
- 2. twice annually, birthday and new year’s, the beloved.
- exaggerate
- to describe in as plain a fashion as an information addict can comprehend.
- excited
- uncomfortable; frightened.
- existentialism
- the study of business and economics.
- exorcism
- having one’s life ceremonially and pragmatically purged of the need for a lawyer.
- expat
- one whom given the choice between a) love it, and b) leave it, chooses c) all of the above.
- expectations
- what one’s spouse will gradually offer more and more often as a replacement for tolerance.