OpenDevil » The Open Devil’s Dictionary

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The Devil’s Dictionary X™

1,267 terms

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The Devil’s Dictionary X™

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lamprey
1. an animal that spends its life sucking—but in a bad way.
2. a similar type of higher mammal which must suck for sustenance; this species is most often observed at casting calls and in deserted board rooms.
largesse
generosity in giving; e.g., “Jennifer Lopez’s charity work shows her largesse.”
late fee
a price one must occasionally pay to one’s bill-collectors for the privilege of having one’s payday scheduled by his employer.
latté
espresso for girls.
see also, espresso.
law
with banking and medicine one of the three crown jewels of Judaism.
law of the jungle, the
an all-purpose, appeal-proof statute which codifies everything from the proper time and place for flinging feces to the sixteen best reasons to kill; the legislation is remarkable especially because it was written using only the letters c, g, a, and t.
lawsuit
how those with something to lose settle a dispute.
leper
a musician who expects to be paid.
lesbian
1. a beautiful, gracious, sexy, intelligent woman who has made a devastatingly poor lifestyle choice.
2. an unappealing, clumsy, dim woman with hygiene issues who has made an enlightened lifestyle choice.

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