The Devil’s Dictionary X™1,267 terms |
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V3
- virtual
- from the Latin virtu, true; truth.
- vitriol
- rancor; bitterness; charisma.
- vocation
- 1. one’s calling; one’s passion in life made proud service to God and man, provided it falls under one of twenty two alphabetized choices, starting with “Accountant,” and ending with “Xerox Machine Operator.”
- 2. the computer chip some new world priest shoved up your ass during the “baptism.”
- volunteer-work
- 1. any number of hours of community service most easily afforded and readily bragged about by rich momma’s boys.
- 2. a spot on one’s résumé; also worth bringing up with due false humility in front of chicks.
- 3. a cynical and self-conscious attempt to improve one’s chances of making the state college undergrad to Harvard grad genetic leap.
- voracious
- confronted with impending drought or dearth.
- vote
- 1. worth a try, provided your vote is going to lead the decisions of at least half a million others.
- 2. approximately 1/1,000th as effective in causing change as a letter to your Congressman.
- 3. approximately 1/1,000,000,000th as effective in causing change as a bullet to your Congressman.
more at Congress. - vulnerability
- what is often and tragically mistaken for harmlessness.