The Open Devil’s Dictionary28 terms |
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- marriage
- 1. a lopsided financial contract entered into by either dimwitted or pregnant young adults. Said contract is dissolvable by either party for any reason, leaving the remaining party financially liable for all debt incurred during the length of the marriage. Fortunately age and maturity usually spells the demise of most marriages leading to freedom, self actualization, and frequently reoccurring high caliber copulations — qualities noticeably absent in between the consumption of wedding cake and divorce.
- 2. An outmoded institution designed to give state and religious authorities control over the individual’s life in an attempt to bind one to a situation favorable for successful and stable child rearing. Its framework was originally conceived when an adult’s life expectancy was shorter than the time required to bring offspring to full maturity.