OpenDevil » PanDictionary2,361 terms |
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C
- C#
- A harbinger of the apocalypse, the final sign of the coming of the End Times, a portent of doom. Not coincidentally, a fairly well-designed Microsoft product.
- Caaba
- n. A large stone presented by the archangel Gabriel to the patriarch Abraham, and preserved at Mecca. The patriarch had perhaps asked the archangel for bread.
- cab
- a thrill ride minus the annual safety certification inspection.
- Cabbage
- n. A familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man’s head. The cabbage is so called from Cabagius, a prince who on ascending the throne issued a decree appointing a High Council of Empire consisting of the members of his predecessor’s Ministry and the cabbages in the royal garden. When any of his Majesty’s measures of state policy miscarried conspicuously it was gravely announced that several members of the High Council had been beheaded, and his murmuring subjects were appeased.
- cable
- a vacuum for time and intellect based on the philosophy of power in numbers—that more channels equals superior selections.
- cackle
- the urban echo of grievances and complaints.
- caffeine
- A contract, wherein a regular heartbeat is exchanged for the ability to introduce subtle bugs, late at night, the day before a product ships.
- Calamity
- n. A more than commonly plain and unmistakable reminder that the affairs of this life are not of our own ordering. Calamities are of two kinds: misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
- California
- 1. the land of uptight flakiness in casual-wear and a great pair of sunglasses.
- 2. the home of flakey uptightness in outrageously priced clothes and a casual pair of sunglasses.
- 3. an area of proud sports fanatics who seem not to understand the games they watch compulsively, as they will break out into riots whether their team wins or loses any major competition.
- 4. a bulky population of large-sized fanatical babies with just enough team-work to turn a car over, or break into a pawn shop without damaging stolen goods on the way out.
- 5. the nearly very liberal State which almost represents close to the farthest left of thinking in this kind of democratic country.
- 6. a factory which consumes tremendous amounts of electricity, natural resources, and foreign labor to produce oranges nearly as delicious as those from Florida, silicon wafers almost as good as those made in Japan, and some of the finest art Adam Sandler and Rob Schneider have to offer.
