OpenDevil » The Open Devil’s Dictionary

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The Devil’s Dictionary X™
kike
a Jewish [Yiddish] word for another, especially poorer, Jew; an unfortunate manifestation of karma.
The Devil’s Dictionary
Kill
v.t. To create a vacancy without nominating a successor.
The Devil’s Dictionary X™
killing
a strongly pronounced success in a venture—usually expressed, “to make a killing”—in various areas from the stock market to a relationship.
The Devil’s Dictionary
Kilt
n. A costume sometimes worn by Scotchmen in America and Americans in Scotland.
The Devil’s Dictionary X™
kind
1. dishonest.
2. scheming.
3. horny.
The Devil’s Dictionary
Kindness
n. A brief preface to ten volumes of exaction.
The Devil’s Dictionary
King
n. A male person commonly known in America as a “crowned head,” although he never wears a crown and has usually no head to speak of.
  A king, in times long, long gone by,
      Said to his lazy jester:
  ”If I were you and you were I
  My moments merrily would fly —
      Nor care nor grief to pester.”
  “The reason, Sire, that you would thrive,”
      The fool said — “if you’ll hear it —
  Is that of all the fools alive
  Who own you for their sovereign, I’ve
      The most forgiving spirit.”
Oogum Bem
The Devil’s Dictionary X™
King, Martin Luther, Jr
1. a man of tremendous clarity, charisma, and wisdom who implored humans to judge each other based on their characters which has somehow come to be interpreted as meaning, “100 years of handouts won’t be enough.”
2. in cities, the boulevard which acts as a dividing line conveniently alerting rich people where not to go.
The Devil’s Dictionary X™
King, Stephen
1. a prolific prate.
2. a prate prolific.

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