OpenDevil » The Open Devil’s Dictionary

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The Devil’s Dictionary X™
old age
1. the nearly final stage of life, when a being is no longer capable of activity, apart from vocal criticism and unconscious manipulation.
2. the opposite of New Age, though equally vague and nonsensical.
more at New Age.
The Devil’s Dictionary
Oleaginous
adj. Oily, smooth, sleek. Disraeli once described the manner of Bishop Wilberforce as “unctuous, oleaginous, saponaceous.” And the good prelate was ever afterward known as Soapy Sam. For every man there is something in the vocabulary that would stick to him like a second skin. His enemies have only to find it.
The Devil’s Dictionary
Olympian
adj. Relating to a mountain in Thessaly, once inhabited by gods, now a repository of yellowing newspapers, beer bottles and mutilated sardine cans, attesting the presence of the tourist and his appetite.
  His name the smirking tourist scrawls
  Upon Minerva’s temple walls,
  Where thundered once Olympian Zeus,
  And marks his appetite’s abuse.
Averil Joop
The Devil’s Dictionary
Omen
n. A sign that something will happen if nothing happens.
The Devil’s Dictionary X™
on the lam
fleeing to evade capture; not to be confused with the Scottish expression, “on the lamb.”
The Devil’s Dictionary X™
onanism
1. the habitual touching of one’s self.
2. the habitual reading of one’s poetry.
The Devil’s Dictionary
Once
adv. Enough.
The Devil’s Dictionary X™
one-trick-pony
1. colloquial phrase used to describe anyone who is named Pauly Shore.
2. a consistently accurate label to place on those celebrities you find on the cover of “People.”
3. a consistently accurate label to place on most any celebrity.
The Devil’s Dictionary X™
Onion
a thing in many layers, all of which are identical in form and quality, ever diminishing in substance as you continue along.

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